its makeover time

a) stop being so loud and annoying. its stupid. just shut up occasionally.
b) people don't really care what you think about issues. shut up.
c) keep your head down. just get some stuff done.
d) get some better clothes. everything you own is crap.
e) stop thinking you're top shit. you're not.
f) being different is not okay.
g) neither is standing out, even if its cause you're so cool.


let's see if you can do it. cause i really don't like who you are at the moment. its time for change.

she's happy tonight

i love alex and mel and mina
i love kelsey
i love emma and emma
i love xinyu
i love kira and jamie

but most of all i love josh.

why ally does what she does

you know, if you invest a lot of time and love and effort into something, and it falls flat on its face, that is a really really sucky thing to happen. like, it kinda hurts.

and i don't want that to happen to me, ever. if there's something that has the potential to hurt, she tries to minimise it in by preparing for it. she creates a bit of a detachment, so that when it inevitably fails, she won't mind too much.

but that's a difficult line to walk. it makes it harder to keep caring. and she tries ever so hard to do that. she tries to make herself not lose interest and get bored, because she knows that would incredibly suck to be the other person.

its a tricky place to be.

wordcount

i'm such an idiot. i'm writing my review draft, and the wordcount is seriously screwing me over.

i mean, i'll get to five hundred words, and then i'll take a break.
oh look, i'm up to four hundred and forty four. only about fifteen left?
two sentences later, i hit wordcount again.
what? only four hundred and seventy? goddamit, i was treating numbers like time again.

you know, i had a thought about the perfect me. you know, when i like myself the most.
its when i'm not behind on anything at school
when i'm not actually involved with any guy(s)
when i put my girlfriends first
when i'm not trying to impress anyone
when there's at least one guy who's interested in me
when i'm at a party, and paying attention to everyone, instead of just a couple of people
when i make new friends
when i don't feel like any one is judging me

and you know what? that was most of last year. it was sweet.
and i figure life's never going to be like that for me again
so i'm glad i enjoyed it while it lasted.

kelsey

geez. now don't i feel just a little bit insignificant.

she did all that. and you know, i do nothing.



thanks.

into the midnight show

another day, another blog.

fricken four wheel drives. mum and i went to the video place last night, to get a movie. anyway, we only had the little car, so we parked it and went in. when we came out again with our movies, there was a spanking big white four wheel drive parked in the space next to us - except because it was parked at an angle, it was totally blocking us from getting our car out of the parking space. we growled a little, but while we were there, the car left, and we went into the bamboo bistro to order our takeaway. gah.

long story short, we were only parked there for about half an hour, and we saw at least two four wheel drives parked so that we couldn't get out. grrr. so when the space next to us was free, we finally backed out of the park. and guess what? that space that the four wheel drives were in was a disabled space. oh my fricken god.


hmmm. and i've got something to say to you. well, of course i do, because you're the only one who reads this damn thing. anyway. i'm not perfect, no one is. and normally that doesn't bother me too much. but it does bother me when i'm with you. cause you don't deserve anything less than perfect.



gah. blogs are dumb. they encourage me to say things i would never actually say out loud.

on the the topic of saying things out loud.....i'm a very mean and bitchy person. well, i say lots of not-very-nice things about you when you're not there. i'm always joking, or being sarcastic (you know this is true cause i do it when you're around too). anyway, maybe people don't pick up on the fact that i'm not being serious. so in case anyone tells you i've been saying nasty things about you, they were jokes.

kthnxbye.